I love to visit Sue’s blog Sue’s News, Views ‘n Muse. She has a wonderful writing style that flows. Sue is a huge fan of spending time with family. The posts that she shares about her family as some of my favorite. I met Sue via Mrs. Matlock’s Alphabe Thursday. She is regular on the hop. I am so blessed to stop by to visit on Thursdays as well as other days of the week.
Pausing Life for Some Mommy Maintenance
Thanks to our good friend JDaniel4’s Mom for inviting me to guest post. This blog is always a delightful place to visit, and I am excited to be a part of it today. I especially like the idea of pausing life for a moment, and though I’m not always good at it, I’m a lot better than I used to be!
Let me begin with a question. How often do mothers of young children take time out for mommy maintenance? If things are the same as they were when I was having babies, the answer is probably “not often enough .”
Back in the day, my sometimes frazzled and frequently sleep-deprived friends and I were influenced by Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s collection of essays called A Gift from the Sea. It’s a little dated for women today, but I think many of her thoughts and concerns about mothering still hold true. Maybe you’ll agree: “With a new awareness, both painful and humorous, I begin to understand why the [Catholic] Saints were rarely married women. I am convinced it has nothing inherently to do, as I once supposed, with chastity or children. It has to do primarily with distractions. The bearing, rearing, feeding, and educating of children; the running of a house with its thousand details; human relationships with their myriad pulls…woman’s normal occupations in general [tend to] run counter to creative life, or contemplative life, or saintly life. The problem is…how to remain whole in the midst of the distractions of life.”
Of course, our children are far more to us than distractions and putting their needs ahead of
our own when necessary is a meaningful gift, one that every mother willingly makes. But the remaining whole is important too, and the trickle-down effects of a mother’s good self-care benefit the entire family. Christ was the most selfless Servant imaginable, yet even He knew when the time had come to withdraw and nurture himself, particularly when demands upon Him were heavy: “…and great multitudes came together to hear, and to be healed by him of their infirmities. And he withdrew himself unto the wilderness, and prayed” (Luke 5-15:16). We all need those moments of solitude sometimes, and we need to make time for them, giving ourselves permission to withdraw into our wilderness, too.
our own when necessary is a meaningful gift, one that every mother willingly makes. But the remaining whole is important too, and the trickle-down effects of a mother’s good self-care benefit the entire family. Christ was the most selfless Servant imaginable, yet even He knew when the time had come to withdraw and nurture himself, particularly when demands upon Him were heavy: “…and great multitudes came together to hear, and to be healed by him of their infirmities. And he withdrew himself unto the wilderness, and prayed” (Luke 5-15:16). We all need those moments of solitude sometimes, and we need to make time for them, giving ourselves permission to withdraw into our wilderness, too.
Solitude
©2003 Susan Noyes Anderson, His Children, Vantage-Point Press
The water is wide and shimmers clear.
Each tree’s reflection, straight and tall,
stands witness to the majesty
of God, who has created all.
In quiet places He draws near;
let any who would seek release
withdraw into the wilderness
and find in Him a sense of peace.
Who needs peace more than mothers of young children? Every woman needs to be able to withdraw into her own wilderness sometimes, to pause life for a moment and just be. And the chances are that it won’t happen without some planning. That’s where mommy maintenance comes in.
Mommy maintenance can mean anything from lying on the front lawn watching the sunset to walking under a harvest moon, feeding hummingbirds, or cutting fresh flowers for the kitchen. For some people, it might mean learning or creating, praying or meditating. It will always mean doing things that bring a smile to our lips and comfort to our hearts, things that remind us of the girl we used to be and the “depth” woman we have become. Lighting a fragrant candle, curling up in my rocking chair, and writing a poem is one of my favorite ways to unwind. Spending time with good friends is a great rejuvenator, too. Whatever you decide to do, make sure you do it with a smile. And leave the guilt behind!
