Pause Life for a Moment- Love Makes Family

Hi, I’m Lauren from “Love Makes a Family.” I am so thankful for this opportunity to be a guest here at JDaniel4’s Mom.

In my short 27 years of life I have learned that it comes in seasons. There are seasons of prosperity and seasons when you look at the bills and your bank account and the numbers just aren’t working in your favor. There are seasons of joy and seasons of mourning. There are seasons of rest and seasons when you feel like one of those hamsters running just as fast as his little legs can carry him to keep that wheel spinning. I have found myself in that season lately and it’s caused me to be more intentional about pausing my life for a moment… because sometimes a moment is all you get!

In the past two years my husband and I have picked up our life with everything we built in one city and moved four hours south. We started over from scratch… new jobs, graduate school, new church, new home. In fact the only things that remained the same were the fact that we were still married to each other, our two cars, and our two cats. As soon as we arrived in the area we hit the ground running. The moving van hadn’t even arrived before I started working. John started a new job in full time ministry and seminary within a week and we were moving into a new home. We hadn’t even had a chance to get remotely settled before life took off at warp speed. I felt scatter brained, overwhelmed and exhausted for months. Wouldn’t you know that during the first few months of our transition God would call us to adopt a little boy from Ethiopia?

John at his new job.

There were all kinds of good reasons why we shouldn’t. The timing was awful. We needed to get settled. John was so busy with school. We didn’t have the money. But there was one reason we should: it was God’s plan for us and it became clear His plan was right there and then. So we put in our application and started the process. So now added to our already crazy lives was a mountain of paperwork, home study visits, adoption education, and fundraising planning and events. I was barely treading water.

One day I just stopped everything. I felt like I was on the verge of a breakdown. So I took the day to pray and think about all the “stuff” in my life. I got a pen and paper and wrote it all down. Then I went through and circled everything that was a priority and crossed the rest out. If it wasn’t something that I had to do then it was off the list. I looked at what I had left and put it in order of priority.

Here’s what I ended up with:

1. Cultivating my relationship with Christ

2. Cultivating my marriage

3. Bringing our son home (adoption paperwork, fundraising, prayer)

4. Youth ministry (especially with the teen girls)

5. My job

I realized that the thing that I cared the least about and the thing that was the least important to me was the very thing I spent the most hours a week doing. So I went to my boss at the end of the week (after talking and praying with my husband) and I gave notice. Six weeks later I worked my last day. Again, there were plenty of reasons why this was a bad idea. After all, we needed the money to bring our son home. But God showed his blessing on this by providing every cent we needed for our adoption and for daily life.

The next several months were just as busy, but less stressful. Within 11 months of my last day at work we pulled into our driveway with our brand new five month old son. That was four months ago.

I believe that a large part of why God led me to quit my job so far in advance to motherhood was that it gave me the time to cultivate my relationship with God,and to actively pray for my son. It allowed my husband and I time together to just be the two of us. It allowed me to prepare as much as possible for motherhood so I didn’t walk straight into it completely stressed out.

The days are busier than ever now. Added to everything else in our lives is our little boy (who just started crawling), and my new blog design business. But, I’ve found a couple practical ways to pause for a moment and take a time out…

I always pray and worship while I rock my son to sleep. I do this for each nap and at bed time. I will start by praying for him and our day and then I sing worship songs to my Savior. My son loves the singing as it soothes him to sleep, and I am able to connect with my God while loving on my son. It’s refreshing and nourishing to my soul.

The second thing I do is always take the first 15-20 minutes of his naptime for myself. The temptation to run around and get chores and such done is strong. But, I need the time to pause. So I don’t answer my phone or return calls, I don’t do any work, I don’t do dishes or laundry… I do something I want to do. That may be just sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee in silence. I might read a book or my Bible. I might blog or read other blogs. The important thing is that I am relaxing and not worrying about anything for just a bit. I get to do this twice a day and it makes a world of difference.

The last but most important thing I would share from my daily life is that I have found morning time with the Lord to be crucial. It sets the tone for the whole day. I know many mothers wake up before their children to get alone with God, but I need the sleep far too much! Instead, we get up when our son does and make the coffee and his bottle. He snuggles in bed with us for a good 30 minutes before we head out to the living room. At that time I get his toys out and he plays on the floor while I sit nearby on the couch with my coffee, Bible, and journal. I read a chapter of whatever book of the Bible I’m in and then I write my observations and how I can apply the truth I’ve learned to my life in my journal. Then I get out a small list I keep and pray. This puts me in the right frame of mind for my day. I am encouraged and motivated to be a Godly wife and mother. I am nourished and fed to spend the rest of the day pouring out… and by giving the day to God I am able to keep the hamster wheel spinning for one more day.

Please take a moment and visit Poppie Lane. You will be so glad that you did!

What do you do in your quiet moments?