I have been reading Bytes of Memory for a long time. She is a wonderful mom. The kind of mom that makes fall bucket lists, amazing crafts, and sets out a hot chocolate buffet while you sit around a fire pit. She makes me want to follow her lead and join her in fun!
There are times in life when life gets paused for you. There are other times when you have to make pausing a conscious decision. For me, this includes making time for my husband. When I start thinking about planning a date, thoughts, such as “now is just not the right time” start flying around in my head, followed by thoughts of “when would be a better time to plan it.” Then I start thinking of excuses such as:
When life slows down… When we have some extra money… When someone offers to watch Sammy… When we have something fun planned… When there is a good movie coming out.. When we are not so tired…
These are the things that run through my head when I want to have a date with my husband, but it’s at this point that I need to remember to put life on pause for a moment and be intentional with my time with Tim. It’s easy for these excuses to cause me to put the idea out of my head completely, but it shouldn’t. Intentional one-on-one time with my husband is more important than any reason not to. There will always be something that seems more pressing or of having a greater priority. Even when dishes are stacked up from dinner or the laundry hamper is overflowing, you need to pause life and enjoy that time. You don’t have to do something amazing to make it an enjoyable time. You don’t even have to leave your house or pay a baby sitter.
Below I have listed a few things that Tim and I have done in the past to get some time together:
Trade babysitting with friends – We did this for a few years with another family where once a month we got to go out on a date and once a month we watched their children. This saves a lot of money on a baby sitter and helps you pause the other things going on and get out of the house for a date.
Eat dinner late – We will sometimes let Sammy eat dinner and get him down for bed. Then we make something different for the two of us and just relax while we eat our dinner.
Get up before the kids – Tim and I have gotten up before Sammy and made coffee to drink together on the back deck while the day is still calm. It doesn’t take long, maybe even as little as 15 minutes, to enjoy a cup of coffee together before the craziness of the morning starts.
Trade services for babysitting – Tim and I are both computer geeks, so we often repair computers for our friends and family and are glad to accept babysitting as ‘payment’.
Plan a game night – After the kids are in bed, get out the board games and start playing. Not into board games? Maybe play a video game, watch a movie, etc.
Your relationship with your husband is important, so remember to take time and plan special things to do with him. Be encouraged to take some time now and plan something special to do together. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money or be elaborate to make a huge impact. Now, go pause life and enjoy a special time with your husband.
Please pause for a moment and visit Bytes of Memory today.
How do you find together time?
This is so true. Thank you for the reminder! And we sometimes eat whip something fancy for just the two of us too…
Great tips!
Thanks for the tips Lindsay! Great ideas! love Bytes of Memory!
I loved this post! Recently Jeff and I have started having regular date nights again, and it has been so wonderful. It’s the kind of thing I *knew* I should do, but just didn’t make it a priority. Until now. 😉
Thanks, Lindsay, for this post…and thanks for having her guest post here! 🙂
A great reminder for all of us!
So true, Lindsay! It’s amazing how life speeds by so quickly that we don’t make the time. Thanks!
Thanks for sharing Lindsay. Such a great reminder to give time to our spouse. I have to admit, my hubby has been rather neglected since the kids came. But making time just for each other – so very important for the family.
I know Lindsay–and she IS a great mom. 🙂 She’s definitely practicing what she preaches here. Way to go.
I love that you trade your computer how-to for babysitting, such a great way to make both sides happy!
Or you can do what we did, send them all off to college. 😉
Joyce
http://joycelansky.blogspot.com
I’m a sucker for board games – any day that includes one is always a great choice!
So… I had this tab open and I came back to it and I was like, “hmm, swear I already commented.” But no comment showed up so I figured I was just wrong (happens quite often) so then I commented again. Only now it turns out I’ve commented twice and I’m that person. #Sadness
I loved this post. So true! We live in a college town with some single friends. We provide dinner and they bring a date and babysit- for a free date. Win- win! Thanks for the comment on my blog- sweetness of the everyday! It has made my morning!
How fun!!! I love all the answers Lindsey! Maybe I need to get DH to trade some of his computer fixing for babysitting :).
These are great ideas, and you are right. Your husband is the one that will be with your forever, long after the kids have grown and moved on to their own lives.
It’s important to guard and nourish that relationship!
=)
these are great ideas. we eat dinner together late because it’s easier. and we enjoy talking about our day without interruption. : )
We do a lot of the same, and it works great! I love couples time!
We like to have our coffee together in the morning as well!
Great tips! I need to do the babysitting trade–it always sounds like such a great idea.
I am also guilty of making excuses. Love the idea of date time before the kids get up.
Dana
I liked your tips! My relationship with my husband gets put on the back burner a lot. Hoping to make it more of a priority, just as soon as I run out of excuses. 😉
We sometimes do that late dinner trick. It’s a nice way to sneak in couple time when you can’t get away for an actual date.