Motherhood Moments Archives

Test Taking Tips and Strategies for Parents

September 2, 2016 By Deirdre

For the first time last year, my son took standardized tests. While I have given them to students for years, I was still very nervous. I decided to research test-taking tips way ahead of time just to calm my nerves now.

I found several awesome resources filled with test-taking tips for parents and students. My very favorite test-taking strategies and reminders have been put Test Taking Tips and Strategies for Parents Page.

The test-taking tips and strategies are also listed below along with why I think they are important. If you have test-taking tips I have left off the list, please leave me a comment below or leave a comment on my Facebook page.

Test-Taking Tips for Parents

Mark the test down on the calendar so you will be aware of the test dates.

If the dates are on the calendar, the likelihood of scheduling appointments on those dates will be slim to none. It is so important for kids to take standardized tests with their class.

Don’t stress your kids out!

My nervousness could add to any stress that my son might already be feeling. If he isn’t worried, I could make him worried.

Get good sleep before a test.

Getting good sleep every night is a good strategy. Before a test, it is even more important. They will be able to focus and concentrate better when they are well-rested.

Eat a good breakfast before a test

Avoiding sugary or heavy foods is important. Having whole grains, fruits, and scrambled eggs will give kids the fuel they will need during the test. These hash browns are a great breakfast idea. This collection of quick and easy breakfast ideas would be great to serve too.

Choose clothes that will be comfortable and not distracting.

Kids don’t need to be adjusting their clothing during the test. Clothes with itchy textures that will cause kids to want to scratch will break their concentration. Clothes with Velcro closures, zippers, or buttons that kids will want to open and close can be a distraction too.

Try to make the time before school stress-free

Trying to have everything ready to go in your kid’s backpack before the rush out the door will cut down on everyone’s frustration. Lunches can be made the night before. Clothes can be laid out early too.

Make sure your child has taken all their medications

You will want to make sure that the medications that help them with medical issues are doing their job. Not having them could lead to health issues coming up during the test

Be at school on time

Being in class to go through the beginning of the school routine will help your kids stay calm.

Wish your child good luck or pray with them on the morning of the test

Taking the time to let them know you believe in them and are taking the time to pray over any concerns will help your kids feel better about testing.

Remind your child to do their best

Sometimes this simple reminder helps kids try on tests.

Practice taking deep breathes to relax

If your children tend to get stressed out about tests, show them how to take deep relaxing breaths. It can calm kids down.

Remind your child to listen and read all directions carefully

Different tests can have very different directions. It is so important to listen and read over directions.

Remind them to use their time wisely

If they get to something they don’t know, they can make an educated guess and move on.

I have had students get bogged down at the beginning of a test. They get very frustrated when others finish much earlier. They get worried about finishing the test. This is one of those testing-taking strategies you don’t want to skip.

Remind them to not worry about if others have finished. They are to just do their best.

This is one of those test-taking tips that is much like the strategy above. I think it deserves its place on this list though. Kids need to know that everyone works at their own pace.

Shop Your Way – In Vehicle Pick Up #MORETOYOU

August 30, 2014 By Deirdre

By the time I had finished second grade my mom had become a single parent. She had three young girls to raise along with teaching 24 kindergartners. To say that her days were busy would be an understatement. Once a season she would head to Sears to get us each a few new clothes to wear. She knew she could count the clothes she got for us at there to last for a few seasons. The clothes that she got at Sears were passed down from one sister to another so they needed to last. When I was asked to share how Sears has come up with a super convenient way for you to shop for your families called In-Vehicle Pick Up, I was really thrilled. Shopping at Sears is a family tradition.

Sears has created a video series called More To You featuring surprises with real people, based on their actual tweets that. The video below is the latest in the series and it shares how their in-vehicle pick up program works. When I was told that the new video featured a surprise for a single mom, my thoughts went immediately to my mom.

The mom in this video had sent out a tweet about how hard it can be to shop with kids. To her surprise someone from Sears reads the tweet and contacts her about stopping by to share with her a new way to shop. Twitter didn’t exist when my mom was raising my sisters and me. If it had, she could probably have sent out the same tweet. We each had our own ideas of what we liked and wanted to wear. She had to make her clothing dollars stretch and find things we would wear. That wasn’t always easy! Thankfully even back then Sears had lots of different brands and styles available.

Here is the video I mentioned featuring a single mom and how Sears responds to her tweet. You will want to take a minute to view it. The video has a surprise ending that I honestly didn’t see coming when I watched it.

Shop Your Way

I am not a single mom but, I love the idea of buying online and using the in-vehicle pickup. Being able to click on the Shop Your Way mobile app to make purchases and specifying that I want to come pick them up makes shopping so much easier. When my purchases are ready, I just head to Sears to pick them up. When my car is in a specially marked parking place, I just need to let Sears know I am waiting outside for my purchases. In five minutes or less someone will bring them right to my car. That sounds wonderful. That will save me a lot of time. (If we had to go into Sears, my son would want to explore many of its departments. We would be there forever.) Getting pull my car right up close to the door to pick up purchases with my son in his booster seat in the backseat sounds great to me.

I bet it would love save you time too. You can look for what you want online at home and swing by to pick up your purchases.

Try #MORETOYOU

Sears is interested in giving more to others who tweet just as Breanna did. Why don’t you send out a tweet to @Sears with the hashtag #MoreToYou and see what happens. I am going to try it and then I am going to follow the #MORETOYOU stream. I want to see what other tweets are being shared on Twitter.

Shop My Mom’s Way

I am seriously going to try to get my mom to sit down and order from Sears. She needs few things for the fall. Ordering them online and driving to the Sears store to pick up her purchases would be so easy for her. She can’t easily walk around the large Sears store near us since she got sick last winter. This is a way that my single mom can shop without walking very far. She will just need to walk a short distance to my car so I can drive her to the Sears’ In-Vehicle Pick Up spot.

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf Sears

Living with Cancer- Cherishing Moments

June 25, 2014 By Deirdre

In March after spending seven weeks in the hospital recovering from liver and kidney failure along gall bladder drainage issues followed by several month in rehab my mom had to make a huge decision. While in the hospital she was found to have pancreatic cancer, now after all that recovering time she had to decide what to do next.

Some things were decided for her. She had to move to a nursing area of the senior community she had a patio home in. People were going to have to help her dress, bathe, and use the restroom. She would probably only live a short time. It was going to be sad to watch her lose the ability to care for herself and be around others who were just waiting to die too.

My sisters and I shared with her our thoughts about chemotherapy and radiation as well as cancer surgery. Each would lengthen her life by a few months maybe. Each would be rough on her and could diminish her quality of life.

We all came to the consensus that making memories and cherishing moments was what was most important. We would hand over the time mom has leftover to her living her life with cancer. God would decide when to take her home and until he did we would love on her.

While I moved forward with getting her house ready for sale and helping get her affairs in order, my mom worked on living. She has taken it super seriously! She has left people in awe of her strength and peace.

Despite knowing that she has a disease that is killing her she learned to dress herself, go to the bathroom on her own, and walk fiercely with a walker. She showed so much improvement that she has moved from the nursing wing on the retirement community into an assisted living apartment.

Thus far she has had a few stomach pains, but has not lost her appetite as doctors tell us she will. She has in fact gained all the weight she lost in the hospital and rehab. Honestly if you look at her you would never know she had cancer.

Some days I forget she has cancer for a few hours. Some days we go over to play bingo with her in the dining room and she looks just like everyone else there. Some days she calls to remind me that I need to buy her boxes of tissues and toilet paper and I buy the bundle of six boxes of tissues and twelve rolls of toilet paper.

She will slow down and she will pass on. We told the decline will happen fast and could happen without warning. That hasn’t stopped us from making plans for her birthday in August and a visit with all her grandchildren later in the summer.

Until her passing comes she is living! She is encouraging us to live! She is changing the lives of people around her who can’t explain why she has lived seven months since her initial diagnosis.

I am so thankful that she is my mom and my teacher! I am so glad she decided to fight through rehab and live!

This post is linked to Pour Your Heart Out on Things I Can’t Say.

Second Hand Birthday

March 5, 2014 By Deirdre

JDaniel has done it again. He has chosen to add another year to his age forcing both of us to now use a second hand when describing his age. It is true! When you turn six you can’t just hold up one hand. You have to hold one finger on the second hand. I totally remember helping him figure out how to hold up two fingers when he was turning two. This has happened way too fast.

He has heard me say it so many times that he has offered to pray that God would turn back time so I could experience his being little just one more time. I have told him that God won’t be able to do that and I actually wouldn’t want to lose any of the memories I have made with him in the last six years. They are truly precious and will be cherished.

Year five could easily be called the year of change for JDaniel. He grew and grew in height. He slimmed out. He face has thinned into a “big boy” face. He totally doesn’t resemble the boy who turned five last year.

Leaving a preschool he loved and starting in a full day five days a week kindergarten program was a huge change. We both had gotten used to a half day of school three days a week and time spent together learning outside of school. There was the added change of lunch at school, homework and being in a huge class. (There are 27 in his kindergarten class.)

His dad (my husband) lost his job and started going to school to learn a new computer language. For JDaniel having him home more has been a gift. He spent a lot of time playing with a dad that wasn’t rushing out the door early and coming home really tired. Dad has been the one to drop him off at school every morning and sometimes pick him up after school. He will always remember those car chats.

Grandmere (My mom) got sick half way through his fifth year. JDaniel hasn’t always wanted to visit her, but he has sure grown in his ability to share compassion and love due to those visits. She just lights up when he comes to see her. He gives her the sweetest hugs and kisses. His prayers for her getting stronger or heading to join Jesus so sweet and tender. I just love his heart. What an amazing man he will be!

There have been some wobbles in his self-confidence this year. A lot of changes can do that to a boy of five. Today at six I can see that confidence starting to grow again. He is jumping into the opportunity to try new things and is conquering skills that have challenged him. I love to see him proud of his accomplishments.

Happy Birthday to my wonderful boy who is now two hands old!

This post is linked to Things I Can’t Say and Mrs. Matlock’s link ups!

Deirdre Smith writes/owns JDaniel4’s Mom. After twenty years as a elementary school and technology resource teacher in Northern Virginia, she became a stay at home mom in upstate South Carolina. Her blog features ways she and her 6 year old are exploring learning, crafting, creating healthy meals and living life to its fullest. Deirdre can also be found on her blog’s FB page. You can also check her out on Google+.

My Mom Is So Much Like Him

February 26, 2014 By Deirdre

My mom is like my son. I never put that together in my mind before my mom got sick and the doctors found cancer in the her pancreas. Now as I spend time helping to care for her, I can see it. We had wondered how we ended up with an extrovert who has always wanted to do things his way and in his own time.

My mom was always so independent and busy before she got sick. There was always some project she was having done on her house. Always some ailment she was trying to find out if she had. If there was a bus trip to Richmond, Virginia or just to the mall she was on the bus heading there. Rarely would she call to ask me to take her anywhere. She wanted to do it on her own without my help.

Now she can take the few steps she can with assistance and can feed herself, but many of the things she needs done have to be done by others. Nursing assistants help her dress and get out of bed. Collecting her mail, paying her bills and dealing with her doctors are some things my sisters or a do for her.

Still she wants to have control of her life! She grabs the control she has uses it as often as she can. Mom tries to roll out of her bed to get free of it. (Unfortunately she has gall bladder drain that doesn’t like to join her. We have had it replace several times.) She has done it so often that her bed is now on the floor and a thick pad catches her when she exits her bed. She tries to wiggle out of her wheelchair. When you ask her to promise to stay until someone can help her get up, she slyly smiles. She can’t make that promise; because the next time the thought comes to her she will impulsively try again.

Mom gets frustrated and even angry when things don’t come easily or her desires aren’t given into easily. Things like go get the car and take me on a trip are just not possible. Yet she would love for me to put in the car and go. When I can’t, she tells me to leave her alone. Well that is possible, it just doesn’t happen. It can’t happen. The time I have with her is precious and limited.

When I head home I watch my almost six year old struggle to master things that take time to grasp or learn. He gets frustrated and sometimes angry. He doesn’t want me to do things for him that he thinks a big boy should do by himself. Unlike my mom he makes promises with that sly smile that he thinks he plans to keep yet that impulsive nature of his will challenge him to break.

I love to watch them together now that I can see how much they are like. They are like two peas in a pod in so many ways.

Deirdre Smith writes/owns JDaniel4’s Mom. After twenty years as a elementary school and technology resource teacher in Northern Virginia, she became a stay at home mom in upstate South Carolina. Her blog features ways she and her 5 year old are exploring learning, crafting, creating healthy meals and living life to its fullest. Deirdre can also be found on her blog’s FB page. You can also check her out on Google+.

A Little Snow Equals Big Joy

February 5, 2014 By Deirdre

My husband kept telling JDaniel that there was snow on the way. I kept checking the weather websites and finding the prediction for 1 to 3 inches. I thought that won’t add up to a day off from school. JDaniel kept saying he was going to get a snow day. The second graders at my school kept practicing a musical called the Big Chill about school getting out early because of an early arrival of snow. I should have known something was going to happen.

It turns out my husband, the second graders, and JDaniel were right. Last Tuesday at 11 o’clock in the morning an announcement came through the PA system sharing that school was closing at noon. The students would have to quickly come to the lunch room to get bag lunches by class so everyone could eat lunch before heading home.

I called my husband and asked him to pick up JDaniel from school. School system was closing for students, but I didn’t know when teachers would be allowed to leave.

I stayed until two o’clock to get work done. Many of the teachers left right after their students did. There still wasn’t any snow falling, but the temperature had dropped drastically. When I called home to say that I was on my way, I was informed that small flakes had started to fall.

By 4 o’clock we had tiny swirling flakes that covered our deck, sidewalk and the non-grassy areas of the yard. JDaniel was thrilled. He swept the snow on the deck rails into his hands that he used to create tiny snowballs to throw at me. I pushed some of the small layer of snow on the deck into my hands and tossed it at him. There wasn’t enough snow for a snowman or snow angel. It really ended up just being a dusting, but we sure had fun playing with it.

I loved watching him excitedly run and leap from patch of snow to patch of snow. Even a tiny bit of snow is exciting when you haven’t had any snow in over a year. We finally went into the house. We had cold fingers and saturated mittens. The snow continued to fall and we both kept our nose pressed up against the window to watch it. We wanted to enjoy its entrance into your world for as long as possible.

Thankfully we were all tucked into our house early on Tuesday afternoon. The roads here got really icy and stayed icy in shady spots for two days. Our little bit of snow would start to melt during the day and then refreeze at night. Parts of our sidewalk were still icy and snow on Thursday afternoon. We were out of school for two days and had a two-hour delay on Friday.

That little bit of snow brought a big change to our weekly schedule. One that made all of us leap the joy.

Deirdre Smith writes/owns JDaniel4’s Mom. After twenty years as an elementary school and technology resource teacher in Northern Virginia, she became a stay at home mom in upstate South Carolina. Her blog features ways she and her 5-year-old are exploring learning, crafting, creating healthy meals and living life to its fullest. Deirdre can also be found on her blog’s FB page. You can also check her out on Google+.

Finding Balance and Knowing Joy

January 29, 2014 By Deirdre

Finding balance is hard on “normal” days and when everything is going smoothly. Sometimes it seems like a small thing like delay due to traffic or a milk spill at breakfast can throw things out of balance. This usually doesn’t happen if you are well-rested and stress-free. Waking up tired and stressed out about events going on in your life can make you or me snippy or on edge when the milk spills or the cars seem to drive extra slow.

I have to remember to count to ten when those things happen and things are out of balance. If I don’t, my words can be harsh and filled with irritation. Those around me get to feel the wrath of those words. It can make them snippy and reply with harsh words. Hopefully, in those times we all take a moment to remember the snippy person is probably having a bad day. Hopefully, by doing so the day turns around and looks a little brighter for both of you.

JDaniel and I recently went to a local park to hike and play on its playground. As I watched him walking carefully on the planks on the hiking trail and conquer the climbing equipment, the word balance kept coming to mind.

So many unplanned events have happened in our lives this year. If you read this blog regularly you know about most of them. We have had a job lost, health issues with my mom, taking on the responsibility for her well being and worldly possessions, and trying all get schoolwork done. Our daily routine has been a struggle to balance. My thought life has struggled to find balance.

Finding Balance and Knowing Joy - Climbing Wall

It has been hard to not be jealous of those people who have more stable lives. Taking the time to get outside and watching JDaniel play reminded me of how much clear planning and careful steps can help us find balance. I watched as he moved slowing and cautiously across a spider web equipment with awe.

Finding Balance and Knowing Joy - Climbing Web

This isn’t the first time God has used my son to teach me the lessons I need learn. He actually uses him often. Maybe it is because I love to watch him learn and play.

I mentioned just after the New Year that JDaniel and I have started sharing five things that fill us with joy every night before bed. Honestly, that has been one of the best things that happens in my day. Looking back on the day and finding five joys has helped me find balance too.

I hope that you are not feeling out of balance. If you are, I hope you will count to ten before you speak, take the time to watch children play, and find five joys in every day.

This post is linked to Alphabe Thursday.

Sharing His Love and His Ted

January 22, 2014 By Deirdre

This is not JDaniel’s actual Ted.

Last Friday I headed over to travel with my mom by ambulance to a doctor’s appointment. The appointment was on a day that JDaniel and I had off from school. JDaniel was going to spend the morning with a friend and her children. He had a bag filled with toys to share with them and his teddy bear. Ted tends to travel with us when we are going new places or on rough days.

The first part of the week had been tough. I went to my mom’s rehab center to feed her dinner every night. She had not eaten much of anything at any meal the week before. She didn’t want the mushy pureed food she was being given. I was determined that she was going to get nourishment and be strong enough to go to the doctor’s appointment.

Mom had also stopped saying much. I heard her tell me the words yuck and quiet and not much more. She had stopped saying my name and didn’t seem to know where she was. Her words indicated she was living in the past.

We decided to try to get her to give us Power of Attorney anyway. She just might talk to my husband and our family lawyer. My amazing sister in law would be present too. She has such a calm and loving presence. She might just change my mom’s mood.

It didn’t work. She asked my husband to help her communicate, but he couldn’t help her successfully say the name of any of her daughters. Any daughter would have done. We all love her and want to help her pay her bills.

We were frustrated to say the least. She was at risk of being asked to leave rehab. She wasn’t able to participate in speech or physical therapy much. We have hospital bills arriving from her seven week stay there. Mom still has a drain from her gall bladder. (Most nursing home facilities won’t accept someone with one.) We prayed as a family, we prayed on our own, I asked you on Facebook to pray.

By the time Friday came and I was heading to drop JDaniel off at my friend’s house I was sure God’s answer to our prayers was either wait or no. Yes just didn’t seem to be an option.

As we pulled into the driveway of my friend’s house, JDaniel said, “Mom, I think Ted needs to stay with you today.” What a gift he was offering me! His special stuffed pal was going to stay with me to encourage, comfort and support me.

I gave JDaniel the biggest hug when we got out of the car. I wanted him to know how touched I was by his generosity.

The day did get better. My mom was totally lucid. She was great at the appointment. She did great with the speech therapist. (I left the room and frantically called our lawyer to see if we could try to get mom to agree to a power of attorney while she was lucid.) She was able to answer the question our attorney needed her to for us to get power of attorney.

Was it Ted that made the day better or mom’s progress or knowing a prayer was answered? Each of those was special. Each put a smile on my face. The real cherry on the top of a wonderful day was the love my son showed me. He has been through so much since his grandmother got sick and he saw past his need to mine. What a special gift!

Angels Among Us

December 25, 2013 By Deirdre

While we totally celebrate Jesus’ birthday on Christmas day, it is the angels like the one displayed in this craft JDaniel made it school last year that are on my mind. I know that God sends his angels to look over us. The Bible shares numerous encounters with angels.

I have never seen an actual angel with wings and halo. They don’t seem to make appearance much anymore. Last week I did encounter a doctor that spoke to me the way I think an angel would.

My mom is in her fourth week in the hospital. I have talked with dozens of nurses and doctors during that time. They have almost all been kind and all have been very caring, but one really stands out.

Dr. H stopped in to check on Mom and I was sitting in a chair beside her. He updated both of us on how she is doing. (She hasn’t walked in weeks and can’t use her hands. They don’t know what started her decline and still are not sure what the cause of her current issues is.) Many doctors have done that with my sisters and I.

What made Dr. H different? He took my hand and said, “Thank you so much for coming to sit with your mom. Being here makes such a difference.” I was floored. What a kind thing to say! It is hard to know when some aren’t speaking clearly if you are making a difference.

What a gift his words were to me! I would continue to visit her daily anyway, but hearing his sweet and thoughtful words really made my day.

It isn’t easy to leave work each day, rush to the hospital for a few hours, rush home to eat dinner with my guys and try to get caught up with all the house and life stuff. (Thankfully my husband has been doing a lot of the things I normally do.)

Visiting with mom is the right thing for my family to do and I am so thankful Dr. H thinks so too.

Mama, Do You Love Me?

October 9, 2013 By Deirdre

My family wasn’t big on saying the words “I Love You” out loud. They wrote it in cards at birthdays, but beyond that I don’t remember hearing it. ( I could be forgetting other instances though.) I tell JDaniel that I love him all the time because of that and well because I love him a whole lot.

When the two of us were together most of the day, I would say it all during the day. He must have loved hearing it, because he has started asking me if I love him when he gets up in the morning, when I pick him up from school, and when I tuck him in a night. It is like he has a deficit in his heart my telling him that I love him.

Starting school has been a transition for us. JDaniel being in school all day has been new for him. It means a longer time of following school rules. There are 27 children in his class and that means there are twenty six other children who need attention from the kindergarten teacher and aide. It means there isn’t someone reminding him that he is special and loved as often.

I am sure the teachers and aides at his school love the students, but it is a different kind of love than he has enjoyed being given to him when he was at home.

There aren’t the constant reminders of being loved. There weren’t constant reminders at home all the time though. We did and still do lock horns. He is expected to follow family rules and when he doesn’t follow them I am sure he doesn’t feel that I love him. JDaniel has shared that very thing with us from his “timeout” spot.

Still right at this moment he need more reassurances that I love him. In many ways he reminds me of a squirrel storing up nuts for the winter. It is like he is stockpiling reminders that I love him to carry with him to school. It feel like he should have had a number of I love yous stored from his younger years, (I know I said it often.) but he doesn’t seem to have enough.

There have been so many changes this fall. Kindergarten full day was a huge change, but there have been others. Knowing his dad and I are both job hunting has made him nervous about the future. We have tried to upbeat and remind him that God will give us the jobs He wants us to have. Having less time to play and do things together do to fuller days is something he has complained about.

So, I am snuggling with JDaniel in the morning and whispering into his ear, ” I love you.” I am placing notes in his lunch telling him that I love him. I am creating I love you lunches. Finally I am hugging him a little longer at bedtime and saying, ” I love you! I love you! I love you!”

We all can have times when the I Love You sections of our hearts need filling so, when JDaniel asks,” Mama, do you love me?” I will answer him back with words of love. He loves to hear them and I so love to say them.

This post is linked to Things I Can’t Say and Mrs. Matlock.